With all the emotion testing and new outbreaks, and everything relating health... I've been feeling a little overwhelmed lately. I've been more accutely aware of how I'm feeling. Feels like the emotional testing actually takes the blame away from you and places it on someone else. Like the other day, I was so angry I was literally shaking and would not smile at anyone who came my way. So I grabbed Stephanie and asked her to test me. Sure enough, there were some emotions sitting right on top. When she released the third one, I literally felt like I had a shot of morphine come over me. Stephanie said she could feel it too.

I have definitely been aware more of people's actions, right or wrong, and the lack of consequences lately. Maybe it was because of the most recent general conference was about being true to yourself and consequences of choices. I dunno. But it seems like I am more aware of people's lack of responisbility, and who they dump it on. As you can probably tell by the forshadowing, it seems like I am always the one who gets the job done.. for everyone.

I also laughed at the one talk in GC where the statment about how people who have less busy schedules than others think they are less important. PSH. That is so crazy. I would ADORE a schedule where I wasn't so busy. I'm lucky I have a smartphone now so that I can keep up with Andrew and myself. Between work, school, and church, and "favors" for other people, we are flying by the seat of our pants. It's just rediculous.

I don't mind doing service. AT ALL. I love helping people who are in a real need. However, I also like it when people know when a future event is happening, and they will need help at that time. That's great. What's NOT great, is when they ask me to do something seemingly simple, and I agree, and then it turns into this huge ordeal because of hidden tasks that they did not mention upfront. I'll give you a hypothetical situation. Jane Doe asks me to let her dogs out for her at a future date for when she goes into labor. GREAT! I love dogs, and would love to help! Sounds simple enough, right? Go over there a couple times a day and let them out. But oh wait, a few weeks later as the due date draws near here comes a list of things to do. They need to be let out at certain times a day, need to be fed certain times a day, one has certain vitamins with her meal, one can't be left unattended... oh yeah, and one of the scheduled times is while you are at work.... How can you possibly achieve that one? Oh yeah, and when you come for the first time first thing in the morning to let them out, apparently one of them has neurological problems that causes her to run in circles and is also totally skittish to strangers and won't go near them. That would be good information to know before hand, right? 'Cause if you had known you would have gone over there a few times to meet the dog so she wasn't totally afraid of you.

This is just an example of irresponsibilities I feel like I have to deal with on a weekly basis. I love to help. But jeeze, HELP me HELP you!

I Know this is a totally bummer blog post. But maybe it's a good reminder for some not to have hidden agendas or maybe for everyone to reset their clocks to the times.

My message if I were a general authority: Stop blaming others for your mistakes. And also one of my favorite quotes: "My failure to plan ahead does not create an emergency for you today".

THANK YOU NEW YORK!

Dreamweaver

So, crazy stuff happens sometimes. I've been dreaming a lot lately, which is bizarre for me to have this many in such a short amount of time. None of them are good (duh). But at least I don't wake up screaming covered in cold sweat like the old ones.

I have been getting spooked a lot easier lately though.. and that is even more bothersome.

I hate feeling vulnerable.
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On a brighter side, tomorrow, at 9 am sharp, I am having my FIRST polygraph done! I am so so thrilled! Don't worry, I didn't do anything wrong! I am actually getting deeper and deeper into the process for my internship (sounds so much more official than "volunteering", right?) for the Arlington Police Department's Victim Advocacy program. This is getting deeper into the process! I don't have much else to do I think. I will be siked once I finally get to go do training and then go in a companionship to "on scene" calls... and really... help people. While for the last couple years I've felt like this is the direction I was destined to go, I want to make sure this is what I really want to do. And what better way to keep your current job in great standing and just go and volunteer for what might be a future permanent career... right? I feel like this will finally make up my mind on the matter. Will the work suck me in completely where I know I will never want to do anything else for a career? Or will it not be what I thought it was? I'm super excited to find out!

I'll let ya know how the test goes!

-STACI

Updates

Whenever I feel like I have stuff to post about, I get to this point and i realize that I really don't have anything else to say.

EXCEPT...

I love ANDREW.... with all my heart. He is truly the reason for me living everyday. He brings a smile to my face, and peace to my soul every time he walks in a room. I thought I knew what love was before him... but I was deadly wrong.

I love being married. We had a discussion about this the other day. How sweet is it to be married to literally your best friend? It's awesome. Stupendous. The best decision I have made my whole life.

I love my family. I wish all of us could live closer. I miss my sisters and their beautiful children.

I am currently in the process of getting a volunteer position with Arlington PD for victim advocacy. I am super excited and can't wait to start training. If all goes well, this could eventually lead to a hopeful job opportunity for me in the future.

Got to go, my super hott hubby needs my attention. Later!

Remember the Post from February?

The weather was beautifully chilly! The picture above are the trees that are between us and the tollway.

Andrew got creative (after seeing a neighbor) and started using our dust pan to shovel snow!


My car was pretty elaborately covered
The trees were mesmerizing... it was like the snow made a back shadow to make them 4 D
Area to the side of our building (golfcourse area)
The infamous graveyard behind our building... SPOOKY
The snow was definitely deep!! Came up to mid calf in this area!
A cute family of a mom and 2 young boys had a snowball fight and built forts the whole time I was shooting
The view from our balcony.
It gives me shivers just to think about it!

I love you guys! Enjoy the Dallas' record snow season!!!!

Yes, Non-digital cameras still exist!

SO, really fun. Yesterday it snowed ALL DAY. No joke, ALL DAY!

Today, it is super bright outside because of all the snow. Luckily, it's not really icy out, just some packed snow still on the ground. The sun really can't be seen beyond the white mass of cloud cover. But all the rays are still bouncing off the snow. Once Fry wakes up and gets off my lap, I'll get my camera that has all my pictures on it and post some.

I'm also super excited. I woke up motivated this morning to dust off the bag that has my 1984 Canon SLR in it (My dad gave it to me a few years ago.) I couldn't believe how long it has been since I took pictures with it. Luckily, I still had one roll of unused film in the bag. I went out and took pictures of the snow and everything for about 45 minutes. I'm glad I did.

Not using it for so long, you forget, you know, how perfect it feels in your hands, and how smooth you get to manually turn the lens to focus your photo. You get to change lenses, normal, telescopic. It was unreal. I think it was just what I needed. It was fun to walk around the back of the complex, and people looked at me like I was a real photographer. It was fun. This camera isn't light either. So, when I ran out of film, I grabbed my digital Nikon out of my pocket, and started shooting with that one. It just wasn't the same: and I love my Nikon! Crazy.

I still think it's funny and kinda lame how everyone thinks that they are a professional just because they own a digital camera.... haha, You Funny! I am NOT claiming to be a pro, but I love the photos and experience of when I'm out shooting.

That SLR reminds me of who I am, and I don't want to forget it

SAINTS WON!!!

I am so so excited for the Saints, and Bryan, and the rest of our family!!!


WHO DAT SAY THEY GONNA BEAT THE SAINTS- WHO DAT! WHO DAT!

Trying to Scale down!

Hey guys! Just so everyone knows, I've started a much smaller, (I mean, how much smaller than this one can you get?) goal-oriented blog. It's titled "Weigh In". I am trying to lose weight, and so far, have has some success! 10lbs! Woohoo. I am no where NEAR where I want to be, but I thought it would be a great way to record the different ways that Andrew & I are changing our diets to get more healthy!

http://staciscalesdown.blogspot.com/

Andrew might make a random appearance or two on there if he wants ;)

Anyways, it's a path of CONSTANT VIGILANCE to lose weight, and we both want it to happen! So, we are trying multiple ways, including diet mainly right now, and then soon will come exercise!

There are several things in the future that we are gonna need to be ready for, and we need to be in shape!

Thanks for the support guys!

Crazy Crazy!

Well- now that the Christmas season is over: I have some photos to share! first off, it snowed twice this season! Once on Dec 2nd, and again on Christmas Eve! It was so cool! -Also so cold- ad yet, the ice was terrible!! This is the view from our window:


On Christmas eve we spent the evening at my parents home. This photo makes me melt. I couldn't find Andrew for a few minutes, and once I went to look, This is what I found:

Isn't that adorable? Man

Also, for Christmas, Andrew promised me a cat! So, we went with a family in our ward, and Andrew helped pick out the perfect one:

We still haven't been able to name him. However, he is very lovable, chill, and handsome!!! He loves to be in your lap, especially when you are trying to accomplish something!

He is all black except for a little white spot on his chest. He is a cuddler:

Yet also mischievious!!! haha

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Money has been EXTREMEMLY tight lately, which has meant that we spend every night indoors and dinner at home every night. Which, is fine, except we both love eating out. We have been really good so far, and Andrew asked me to go on a date with him to Red Robin last night.

Dinner was great, the food tasted awesome! However, the closest Red Robin to us is about 35 minutes away. However, you guessed it, that campfire sauce keeps Andrew coming back! So, we went and it was fun to get out of the house. However, we missed our exit on the way back, and ended up getting seriously lost. It was fun though. We had no where to be, so it didn't make much of a difference.

We ended up in Los Colinas, and it was so fun! Andrew ended up finding signs to the Las Colinas horses. It was so fun! We were drenched, but fun.

Obviously, Andrew had fun playing in the rain.

And I also have a picture like that above from the last time I had been there! haha.

Needless to say, we were soaked from the pouring rain, and my socks were wet. Seeing this, I decided to go puddle jumping. I figured it couldn't get any worse. It was a lot of fun. We also parked somewhere behind these buildings and took about 5-10 minutes to walk back. fun stuff!
Please ignore my stupid face in this picture, haha:

Not that I've forgotten, but last night reminded me of all the reasons I fell in love with Andrew in the first place :)

Love you guys! Hope your new year is going great!